August 17, 2007

FCuk em all !!!

Have you experienced a moment where you wished everything around you stopped and freezes and you are the only who who feels alive, cause when everything else is alive and moving you feel dead and trapped?? Or more likely going tro death in a slow process... that's how i felt for a few months... I've been bumming at home with no Internet connection... my phone lines were dead, and the only thing i had with me was my 29 inches TV and my mom's harlequin romance novel that turns you into a hypocrite... cause you wann all that romance, yet you know its fantasy but you claim to be a realist?? WTF!!!

Anyways... i was going through a moment of REDs... these are not like BLues.. where you have a bad hair day, an acne , your car breaks down.. REds are worse than that, they suffocate you, other people's jealousy and manipulation feed on you, you realise that your own family is against you, your best friend feels better about her breakup cause your bf dumped you in a more awful manner, your ex shows up any says he thinks he loves you after 3 freaking yrs only to find out his current gf hates him, you are often asked why you are single? why you don have a friendster??? My personal life is private... i don wanna parade my pics and let the world known wats my fav food, clothes and crappp..... i have enough headaches with ppl in my life!! Do i need another 50000 unknown friends???

The crappie part is wen u realise that every single ppl in your life have invaded your space (there is this line you dont cross)that even when you are taking ur shower some moron will knock and screw ur moment of solitary.... everybody talks smack bout everything and nobody actually cares what you think and how you actually feel.....

Ur family- They think you are weird when you tell them ur dreams, they take you for granted(you are only wanted when: washing dishes,laundry,cleaning) You work like a dog to get someones attention but ur parent pays more attention to the one who has the most attention, every thing you say or do is left to deaf ears...... You try, and try, yet you are ignored, you still suck in their eyes, You try to keep
away, they bug you even when you sleep, (when you cry ur self 2 sleep thats when they switch on the lights and talk loudly)
And just sometimes you wish they could just love you the way you are, you donwann their money,just love and affection
but they cant seem to give even that.. sometimes even when you to do the right thing you end up falling on your face.
Dysfunctional family is common, but not when you feel trapped and slowly your souls is taken away!!!

BFF- Who ever who came up with that term didn't know what the hell he or she was talking about!!! There is o nly two type of friend, one is
the one you trust and the one you don't. I can count with my fingers when it comes to ppl i trust, believe me non of my family
members are in it!!! The one you trust is the ones who also opens up to you, not someone who only listens and never tells you
anything, it means she or he doesn't think you are trust able , they are shrouded with secrecy and feel you are not important enough, (I'm talkin bout basic stuffs like family, horrible ex , not explicit details) They claim they love you, but yet they indulge on the fact you are as unhappy as they are, you got dumped in a worse manner,you have put on tons of weight so its ok if they do too,they have a bf and you are dead single,( at least their time is pre-occupied while you read MIlls and BOOns and croon when you see Clive Owen or Keanu Reeves!!!
To think about it you don need poison to kill yourself, ppl like this take the life out of you...

Your Ex- Another specimen to screw up your life.
The day you walk out of our life don come back..
Because you had a choice, your choice was to walk out..
You never loved before, what makes you think you do now??
You shattered hearts before, what makes you think you wont wreck it again?
The word X says it all... i donwanna buddy buddy wif you... i don believe in that, in the long run someone is gonna get hurt
again... the only consolation your ex can give is, GET OUT of your life 4ever, cease to exist,NO phone calls,NO sms, maybe
a pathethic email once in a while... but bottom of line is Just GET OUT!!!

TMnet- I dono wat to say about this ppl..... streamyx suckzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz 2 der core

I'm showing my middle finger!!!

1 comment:

zewt said...

boy oh boy... are u ok? much fury u have there.